TAXI!!! (or not)

We had a little hiatus due to the ITIS (if you don't know what that means look it up). But we are back at it.

I decided for myself since I can't find a job to save my life...much less a callback for any interview for a damn job that I am gonna do 2 things. First- study for the upcoming LSATs in October or November (which are a bitch)...and second- drive a taxi. Now I never really considered it and from an ego standpoint..a college grad drivin a cab? Really? Only those immigrants do that shit. But then you realize...hmm ok you can make like $200-$300/day like a bartender would. So you give it a shot.

I digress tho. While I was at the 24-hour taxi course that everyone is required to take in order to drive a cab in NYC- you had me (probably the only born and raised NYC native there), a BUNCHA Indians-Pakistanis, a couple Africans and the Asian here and there. In a Sunday morning class, a fellow Indian was teaching the class and he admitted that most of their people "don't feel comfortable picking up a person of color because either he might try to rob them, take them somewhere far and not pay him or just not pay him". Which makes sense. I can't tell you how many times I've been passed over by a cabbie (unless he's African of course) in the late night hours. Even after chasing one to a red light they'll lock their doors and act like they are done for the night...when 3 blocks later they pick up someone who is "less threatening" if you will. The cab doesn't even stop if I'm standin with one of my white friends. So the strategy I have adopted is to simply stand away and let my boy hail the cab and to only turn around AFTER the door is open. Then he can't say or do shit bc it'll make him look even worse.

Even when you get in the taxi, it's sometimes annoying because they're ALWAYS on their damn bluetooths (which I learned is illegal- but for those who had been driving for years they will not listen) and with that retarded as fuck TAXI TV. But I don't really care because all I want to do is go home at that point. The part that's disappointing is that for the most part they're good guys, relatively nice people. But that first hurdle to climb is like watchin The Biggest Loser on Day 1 and watchin them try to climb a wall.

And so on.

Grave Robbers

I came up with the title of this one because it was the only way I could possibly describe this situation. When you go after significantly younger guys/girls, it's called robbin' the cradle. So I decided, when you go after older men/women it's the exact opposite.

In high school it was always considered okay for freshman girls to date senior guys and all. There's still nothin' wrong with it, it's a perk of being an upperclassmen. That was the extent of things though. You always had one nut-job case where a 15 year-old girl is dating some 20-something, but you just shrugged the shoulders and said "whatever."

Since my college debut, I have been flabbergasted by girls who go after, date, or fool around with guys that are way older than they are. Not seniors, not grad students, I'm talkin' divorcees or dudes with wives (even kids)! What propels them to do such acts? 

One girl claimed it was because they were more ''experienced.'' You're telling me that in a world saturated with young bucks looking to get their dick wet, that you can't find one good lay? Lord have mercy. 

Another reason I have seen girls latch onto these older gents is because they have something most young guys don't...money. As we know, money is a serious issue. Half of divorces are due to financial issues. So they see money, security and possibly power (all things that are said to be turn-ons to women) and awkwardly start feelin' frisky.

The last reason I can see it happening, is a common reason. A girl I knew in school was humpin' her boss from the grocery store she worked at. She never gave any of us a straight answer as to why she did it, but the dude was married with a wife and kids. Even more awkward is that she'd be friendly with the wife and babysit the kids. She even used to sleep in their bed among other weird things. So what's am I getting at? Jealousy. People love what they can't have/what others have. This is tried and true, no doubt about it. I got almost 10-fold more attention and interest from girls when I was in relationships as opposed to being single. So basically, a lot of these girls just want what the wives of these older dudes have. It's pretty weird and I can't sympathize, but at least I understand it better that way.

All in all, it's a pretty sad situation that there aren't enough good young men to keep the faith of girls out there (although, there's plenty of whacked out girls who just have a thing for guys like their dad!). Ugh.. there really isn't an excuse for it, what's gonna happen when he stops getting it up? When does that awkward situation occur when he's officially too old/unappealing and you have to cut him loose? What if he upsets you or cuts you loose (assuming he has kids)...are you gonna snitch? There's so many bad outcomes and situations, is it even worth the hassle? My advice, go out, find yourself a mature young man and if you have to, teach him a thing or two. 

Ew.

The New Phenomenon: Rappers Who Go Clark Kellogg In Internet Videos

The New Phenomenon: Rappers Who Go Clark Kellogg In Internet Videos
Disgrace2YourRace
5.24.09

There has been an interesting development of late, with the proliferation of internet "buzz" to promote (and maintain the relevancy therein) of a particular rapper; especially those who partake in slandering others. It's pretty hilarious to watch a guy being given groundball questions, or something that is sure to rile up the fanbase of the rapper he's talking trash about, and then when the rapper being recorded begins to talk, he resorts to looking away from the camera the entire "interview".
http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhJ18Q719LGo7q42Fu

I call it the Clark Kellogg, because Kellogg was known to NEVER look into the camera when he worked the CBS Sports studio during the NCAA March Madness telecasts (before entering the booth with Jim Nantz as lead broadcaster for CBS's coverage of the NCAA tournament in 2008-2009). Lower body root canals for all (people who pay attention to broadcasters know what that is in reference to ha).
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTp0faw9ouA

If you are going to be on TV: LOOK INTO THE CAMERA! The feds aren't watching WorldStarHipHop or MyJiggie ha.

Vultures, Fleet Week & Attention Whores. Oh My.

In my R-Block Blotter I will prob write about this again; albeit in more of a recap form. Nevertheless- this is an overall perspective and I get to see this all in one night so here goes:

Most places you go in the city, single dudes have the tendency to outnumber single girls. As I have learned, the phrase "Single and ready to mingle" is a 95% lie. They are only mingle with those fellas who will buy them drinks as stated in the previous blog, or those who fit their 394,945 things they look for in a dude. And you know this at a bar/club how? Anyway, it has always baffled me when you see a group of dudes goin after ONE particular girl in the bar. For example, I happened to go talk to this girl for the fuck of it since she kinda eyed me. After talkin for a few minutes or whatever, I had died laughin because she was textin someone on her phone named "Da Ghetto Boi" and tho I really wasn't tryin to read what she wrote...the dude's text was so obvious "Why can't we fuckkkkkkkk". DEAR GOD ha. The whole time tho these 3 spanish dudes that were behind her were plottin in case I decided to even step aside for 2 seconds. I wasn't goin hard, and the second I stepped aside, these dudes harp on her and begin conversin. When I left 20 or so min later, they were all buyin a round of shots and she wanted to pay for hers, but the dude was insisting that she doesn't. Um, and why?? It's NOT chivalrous of you to do that, if anything you're lettin her have the power by doing this. All in the meantime, if I REALLY wanted to; I woulda got her digits and/or Facebook but I wasn't in the zone.

Fleet Week brings out the Navy men and Marines usually. God bless them for what they do for this country and I know a few people who are in them. Girls however for some inexplicable reason fawn ALL over them. Is it the uniform? Most likely it is. You'll see the flyest chicks walkin around giggly with one of the Fleet Week men and it used to frustrate me knowin that for this weekend I don't have much of a chance with the ladies. But the past couple of years I have had a revelation and some female colleagues have shown me otherwise. First off, apparently they're not as appealing to them when they're by themselves vs. if they're all in a group. Secondly, it TRULY separates those who have common sense to those who don't. It's kinda like goin after the girl who wears the highest skirt, if you will. A girl on the train who began a convo with me (and for once on the LIRR it was a good one) even told me her "gay-dar" senses tell her that most of them are gay. Well I don't have a personal opinion on this but now Fleet Week to me isn't the NIGHTMARE I used to think it was.

Now with the attention whores- at Karaoke some people have the tendency to not listen. My boy's doin a song and these 2 retarded dudes are on stage and want to sing with him. Don't nobody want your Clay Aiken/Kris Allen (yeah I said it) duet punkasses up here dancin on the stage with your 2 girl friends. Well the girl friends could dance but that's a whole other story. Tryin to steal someone else's shine is somethin you just do not do. And yes Karaoke is fun, but it's NOT a concert ha.

And so on.

Drink Slores

This one has been a long time comin. On a given night out, there is a long standing tradition of guys buying drinks for girls. It has gotten so bad that some girls expect the drinks and also expect to be able to receive them/not reciprocate in any way. I'm not implying at all that girls should sleep or make out with guys who buy them drinks. If a young gent buys you a drink, you at least owe him some entertaining chit-chat or temporary company. I've seen chicks accept a drink and then try to pull a "thanks, bye!" maneuver, that's downright cunt status.

Now this awful wallet-depleting gag is pretty much a good thing that has gotten way out of hand with the evolution of society. Once upon a time it was an honor to have a dude buy you something to drink, it meant something. And in those days, it was also advantageous to the male because women would get drunk and be easier to get into bed (and they were okay with this). Essentially, it was a way of saying "Hi, I'm interested in seeing where things go this evening...even if it means knockin some boots." The ladies were grateful and at least showed some gratitude even if it wasn't genuine. Now, you're lucky if you even get a "thanks." Girls are now also privy to the fact that men get them drunk to get laid (and use it to their advantage).

Lack of gratitude is another killer. You buy a girl a drink, whether it be for a friend or for a lady of interest... i'd say more than half the time you don't even get a simple "thank you." If you plan on keeping it short and movin on after snaking the dude for anywhere from 6-10$, at LEAST say "thank you." Now if maybe you're interested and plan on sticking around a while, it may not be necessary. Like I previously stated though, you are obliged to at least give some entertaining conversation or good company in return (even if it's only 5-10 mins). Don't make the dude feel totally rejected and useless (or make yourself look like a complete gold-diggin drink slut). I appreciate being able to spot a sucker, but have some dignity.

On that note, these ladies are another interesting product of the evolving cat/mouse game we play. There are girls out there these days who are essentially drink poachers. They warm up to young (and old) men just to pry the dough from their billfolds. All to not have to spend a few bucks on a drink and have the satisfaction of being "pursued." I had a girl once tell me she does it just for "the chase." AKA "I love being fulfilled by poor saps I'm taking for a ride just to feed my ego.".. no words, just wow. Other girls will try any trick in the book to get their sweet nectar with no financial obligation. Every week I see sad dudes throwing away hard earned money on chicks they won't speak more than 5 words to.

There are cases where it's alright to buy drinks for women and it varies from guy to guy. Some will buy anyone a drink, others a select few. I am much more inclined to spend my cash on a girl if I feel she's earned it/deserves it. Is she entertaining me? Is she overly cool? Did she do something that made me say, "I'm gonna get this girl something to drink!" Obviously if you're connecting on other levels, then a drink is probably in order.. these are more just social reasons I have stated. Does it make you a fool for buying drinks? If you don't have some kind of standard, then probably. If you can't spot a drink-slut, then yes. 

Moral of the story is: guys, make 'em earn it and it'll weed out the despicable drink-whoring skanks... either they'll adapt or be sad buying their own booze. Or just take the easy road and don't do it at all. Buying a drink exhibits your acceptance of their dominance in the relationship (if you're dating, none of this applies). The dudes who reach into their wallet in the first minute of knowing a girl ...now THOSE are the fools we all get a good laugh from on a night out. My slogan for the weak- "Say No, Keep your dough!" Stay strong fellas.

P.S.- Fuck T-Pain.

The Sensitive Snitch.

Today's story is a throwback from back in 2007.

At this time- I had an internship over at a Sports Entertainment company out in the city. This was one of the rare times in which I actually got the job offer with very little problem. For the most part I did work in the athletes and celebrities division and everyone did their own thing. Shit, I even had my own cubicle to fuck with.

Durin my downtime- as any college intern would do, they'd spend some time fuckin around on Facebook. I had created a group called FUCK LONG ISLAND (which btw is 160 members strong ha) and I decided to send an invite to everyone on my friend's list (yeah I even did to people who are from LI- because even ppl from there hate it over there, as they should). It just so happened that one of the girls that was also interning for them at the time was on my friend's list...albeit we never really seen eye-to-eye. She got an invite, rejected it I'm sure...but the kicker was- she ended up telling some higher-up about it and then as I was eating lunch in my cubicle...he told me to come in his office afterwards.

Quite honestly it was the most retarded 90 seconds of my life which I still demand back to this day. The guy goes to me somewhere along the lines "You can't be sending people stuff about Fuck Long Island...I'm from Long Island myself and I would find it very offensive." Grow some fuckin balls dude. I do understand that business and personal stuff shouldn't really mix in a work environment but Good Lord. IT'S A FACEBOOK GROUP. The funny thing is that this chick NEVER came to my face and complained about it. Granted it was swept under the rug thereafter but...I want those 90 seconds back.

I mean there's not much you can do anymore in regards to social networking sites. Everyone's their own personal CIA and looks up everything about you...hell who needs GPS anymore? But back to you sensitive type people. Grab some sensitive skin lotion and toughen up a little. Loosen up a bit, but not too too much. Do you need your little buddy buddy to have a sit-down with me because I'm not good enough? Because I'm not from LI so I won't relate? Because my nose isn't elongated enough to be stuck under someone's ass? Fuck your couch sensitive snitches (and bitches alike).

And so on.

Atrocious Attire

Once upon a time, people used to go out wearing the standard jeans and a shirt. Some more glamorous or revealing than others and some more laid back. Now on a typical night out, you have people who still look standard and presentable or even a little well dressed. On the other hand you have people who like to go out to an average bar or night spot wearing these weird diva mini-dresses. Again, there is nothing wrong with dressing well.. but this isn't even well, it's borderline trashy. Just because Paris and Lindsay walk around in them so you can get up-skirts and nip-slips for the paparazzi, doesn't mean you should. For starters, these dresses usually look like you are wearing garbage bags, which immediately makes you look like Missy Elliot in the video for ''The Rain (Supa-Dupa Fly)''. Beep! Beep! Who got the keys to the Jeep!?

On top of looking like "Misdemeanor," half the time these chicks don't have the body to fill these dresses out anyways. You always see flat chested girls pullin them up because their lack of boobage is hindering their chance for a crotch-o-graph. On the other end, you have bigger girls wearin them with their unflattering cottage cheese ass flappin out the back..which is just plain wrong. There is nothing wrong with a bigger girl who is or wants to be sexy, but it's damn important to know your personal boundaries. If you got jello-arm... wear sleeves. If you got cottage cheese ass.. wear pants. If you got turkey neck... good god get a scarf. If you're ugly... well you're shit out of luck. You can fix fat, you can't fix ugly.

Worst of all it's an unflattering look for girls because of the way these hefty bag dresses look. They puff out, so dudes have no read on what you might look like under there. You might as well be tryin to pluck girls off myspace with just head-up photos from good angles. They make skinny girls look starved and they make thicker girls look big.. it's a lose/lose. Even worse than the force-flex dresses are the girls who wear these longer elegant tank tops AS dresses. This is one of the most awkward pieces of clothing I've ever seen. It's not sure what it is. When you wear it with pants, it looks like a dress. When you wear it as a dress, it looks like a shirt. Ladies, as much as men enjoy revealing clothes.. please don't attempt to rock one of these as an outfit. Not only do you look too dumb to dress yourself, the only guys you are going to attract are the ones you wake up next to, look over and suddenly check yourself for crabs.

Lastly, my personal favorite.. is the girl who dresses like this and then complains about the "negative attention." So you have grimy guys all over you, girls calling you a slut, creepers following you into dark alleys and you complain?! I came out with my boobs pushed up high enough to choke myself, my "dress" is so short you can see the bottom of my ass cheeks and it's OTHER people's faults for giving ME unwanted attention.. Here's a cyanide martini you bimbo. Don't want weird guys hitting on you? Don't want to be called a slut? Want to avoid seedy scenarios in poorly lit areas? WEAR CLOTHES!

When Life Hands You Lemons...

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Things You Just... Don't... DO.

Things You Just... Don't... DO.
Disgrace 2 Your Race
5.7.09

Goodness. YouTube is good for a lifetime of laughs. We can all agree there. But there are some things that just need to stay off camera and avoid the internet at all costs. The problem is, the guilty parties think that by doing this outrageous nonsense that they will get noticed by Anderson Cooper's crack stuff for AC360 or something and become famous for this tomfoolery. Sheesh.

Here's an example of an offender:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kfMoQ5MPlfc

First of all, WHY IS SHE UP ON THE FUCKIN' TABLE??? Does she not realize she's as big as Julius Peppers http://tampabaywatch.files.wordpress.com/2007/09/julius-peppers.jpg? That table is not designed to support that type of tonnage.

The second offender is becoming more and more prevalent as this type of behavior is "accepted" nowadays:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9HHbeILuwVM
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=43qJYjuqMZE

WHAT.
ON.
EARTH?

I have no words for any of this and I may have quite possibly lost my appetite even though I have a steak cooking right now DEAR GOD.

ENOUGH WITH THE MADNESS!!!

Backyard BBQ Dancing

Disclaimer- this is another emailed entry by Marissa from Ohio.

So, this morning someone directed me to a link on YouTube. It's some hood chicks dancing at a backyard barbeque. But there are a few issues I have with this mess.

First off: people already think that all black people do is sit around, listen to rap music, and shake our asses. So yay for putting that crap on YouTube. No really, I honestly hate you. Let's face it: black people know that this goes on behind closed doors but to put it worldwide for everyone to see and laugh at? Thanks for airing dirty laundry.

Second: You're doing this in front of children. Really? And then encouraging the three-year old to join? See...these are the kids I'm scared for. That little boy is going to be robbing people atATMs in about twelve years. And that little girl is going to have had two kids and a miscarriage and will be dropping out of school by age sixteen.

Third: grow the fuck up. You are not twenty anymore. You are grown ass women running around with kids trying to shake asses like someone is tossing dollars. You fucking fail.

And to the guy who posted it who is so proud of his hoodrat does she have a real job? How many kids? Does she clean her house before she starts trying to be a bootleg skrippa? Is this REALLY something to be proud of? Then again I know that's your baby boo...until she thinks you're cheating on her with her cousin and cuts you in a Burger King parking lot and does six-months.

I can't handle black people right now. Really. I'm now changing my race to "Other".

...I am not a blogger...

Download of the day: Notorious B.I.G. and Bob Marley- "Hold Ya Head".

The Hater Congratulator.

With social networking more popular than ever before, people have taken their cravings for attention to an all-time high. People strive to have the most "friends" possible or the "coolest" personal page so everyone can be like "yeah this cat is cool, yada yada yada." With girls it's worse because they'll spend 20 minutes with their 3 megapixel camera in the bathroom bent over like they're auditioning for Kim Kardashian's part in Ray J's next sex tape and takin "seductive" pictures. Which in turn works because us dudes will leave 200 comments on the order of "yo ma l00kin g00d, h011a @ d@ k!d" or "damn i wish i was behind dat ass mmph!" But then for some reason or another, these same attention whores begin to complain when people shit on their pictures or somethin...or they have drama with hollerin at their mans or whatever. "Yo bitch why u talkin to my man triflin whore, do it ta ma face I'ma check u I'ma see u when I see u BITCH!" Or, it'll be somethin simple as "Ugly azz trash". Ahh, don't you feel the love?

So now, you have rappers like Maino who come to the rescue for these people who are supposedly being hated on. "Hi Hater, Bye Hater." And this "Big Ups to All My Haters" Yes, I know what the premise behind it is, giving acknowledgment to those trash talkers. And it's all well and good. Except for 3 things.

1) It has become way overblown. I bet you half the people who have "haters" just say so because they could be down. It could be as simple as being stared down for one second too long and that person don't know you. WHY HE HATIN ON ME FO, GRILLIN ME FO 4 SECONDS WHEN I BOUT TO SIT?!?! Or, they just want to say they have haters when in reality everyone is apathetic to your mediocrity.

2) We all know people want drama. Without drama, life would be boring and reality TV would not exist. People decide to start shit to make themselves feel better, and in return the Hater Congratulator gets wide-eyed and now has reasons to go on their "such a hater" rant. If you ignore it, that person may still be a "hater" but they're not your own hater. How about that?

3) It increases this person's somewhat "popularity". Just like every celebrity has their fans and their people who dislike em, now this person in their mind believes they are a mini-celebrity.

While I will continue to personally hate because it's just what I do, it's more to a general populus and you, the Hater Congratulator...are a disgrace.

And so on.

"Reality" TV

Thanks to everyone for taking part in last week's poll, declaring Laguna Beach the most disgraceful "reality" TV show out there! That was just foreshadowing for this week's entry about the shameful and disgusting nature of reality television.

Ever since the first big reality TV shows (Real World, Road Rules, etc), I have detested this outbreak of trash TV. Not only was it taking away from music on MUSIC television, but also the solid shows. With evolution of this abortion of television, we have seen Laguna Beach (and it's 8 spin-offs), all 30 of the "______ of Love" shows, 20 Survivors, Keeping Up With the Kardashians, the Surreal Life and many other nauseating programs. 

Why do people enjoy this high school drama brand of television? Who cares what is happening to random unimportant people in the world? Apparently if you film people put in dramatic everyday situations, then people will care (not only about what happens, but the characters!). I was in the mall a few years ago and some average looking girl is in line next to me, she gets to the counter and the cashier girl pulls an "Oh my gawwd, can I have your autograph!?" Trying to figure out who it was, I sat there for a while. Once she left, I just asked and they said it was some real world girl. STOP THE PRESSES! I got an autograph from a reality TV nobody! Awesome! I shook my head in shame for the poor cashier girl.

I really want to know who was sitting around one day and was like... "I have the next hit show!" We're going to go to high school parties with rich, pretty, harmless white kids and follow them to see the girls be bitches and the guys play them! GOLD! We'll title it Laguna Beach because it goes with the Hollister lifestyle and we will revolutionize TV (into crap). My favorite thing is that they have crossovers from show to show! Brody Jenner is not only on "The Hills" but he's also the stepbrother of Kim Kardashian! Baffling!

It's almost like that 6 degrees of separation game, Brody is stepbrothers with Kim, who made a sex tape with Ray J.... WHO HAS HIS OWN SHOW! For the Love of Ray J (FOR THE LOVE OF GOD)! Wow, this poor boy is so broke that he got his own reality show to find love. As if a bunch of crazy gold diggers would ever love anything but your "celeb" status or the chance to say I'm getting smashed by a singer (Who had such hit songs as....um....uh....help me out here... oh yea, he split 'Sexy Can I?' with Yung Berg). What's next, A Shot at Love with Amy Fisher?! 

The major things that all of these people in the shows (and the followers) have in common? Shame and Disgrace! The only people I can respect who watch are guys watching 'Keeping Up With the Kardashians' on mute with a bottle of Jergen's. To the rest, Lauren Conrad's drama isn't any worse or less important than your own. Stop living vicariously through others, get off the couch and live it yourself! I leave you with.... Next time on Laguna Beach.

Disgraceful Facial Faux Pas

Disclaimer-This an emailed entry sent to us courtesy of Melissa from Florida.

Why do people think this is attractive?

Humans grow eyebrows. We have them so you do not have to shave yours off and draw them on everyday. Yes, I understand some women have thin eyebrows and they need to be filled in. But have you ever seen someone with sharpie eyebrows WITHOUT their sharpie on? 

It's enough to give me nightmares. YOU CAN SEE HER PERMA-STAIN FROM WHERE SHE DRAWS THEM ON! And it looks like she's one that gives herself an arch that looks like someone is permanently pulling her scalp backwards. These two instances happen to be latinas, but believe me, I have seen every race do this. The first picture is also a good instance of HORRIBLE lip liner. This is not ok, Mrs Eminem (or ex-Mrs. Eminem, whatever she is now.) 

You know, I don't know what's worse, women that do this to themselves, or the men that date them/give them attention. How about everyone ignores them? If I ever look like this, please stop talking to me!

Armageddon Drivers.

Livin and drivin in NYC, you encounter a lot of types of drivers. The rare type is the one that knows their role. In other words, if they know they're slow, they keep their asses in the right lane on the highway; or if they're slowin down the left lane, they move over accordingly. I'll give credit where it's due and say that most people have their signals on when they're about to turn and shit. In my trials and tribulations I have heard people bitch about Jew drivers, Asian drivers and women drivers as the three worst...with taxis and trucks following close behind them. However, I have come to the realization that this group of people grind my gears the most. The JESUS BUMPER STICKER DRIVER.

What's that you may ask? They tend to be the Sunday driver (in other words, people who act as if they're the only people on the road doing 20 in a 35 and in no particular rush to get anywhere unless it's to church). However they drive like this every day of the week and that's not even the most annoying. They have messages strewn all over their car "JESUS IS COMING REPENT OR PERISH", "IT'S ALL GOOD, I GOT GOD IN CONTROL", "MAKE JESUS ONE WITH YOU", "BE READY FOR THE 2ND COMING OF CHRIST". Hey, I don't have an issue with one being proud of their faith, however...
1) Speed the fuck up or at least to the point where I can get to the next lane.
2) While I believe in God myself, people that don't and have to drive behind these people may go into a Satanic fit of rage...which isn't good for the rest of us.
3) Stop tryin to scare people with these messages.

I always wondered if I ever got into an accident with one of these people, they would hop out the car, sit down with me and then give me a 45 minute sermon about how everything happens for a reason and if I had let God in control of my car this accident would not have happened and it's my punishment. I'd give it 2-1 odds.

While I can't go around calling these people disgraceful because they are probably decent people...the way that they drive on these roads certainly are.

And so on

Toilet Humor

In honor of all the disease hype in the recent news, I thought I'd try to keep the blog current with the times. There is a serious epidemic going around (other than the Swine Flu) and it needs to be stopped NOW. Every now and again I'll be on a social networking site (Facebook, Myspace, etc.) and I'll see a female friend has new pictures, so I'll browse. I'll be flipping through her album and all of a sudden... without fail... BOOM! A picture of a girl on a toilet. WHAT...THE...FUCK?

Please, PLEASE, tell me why in the name of Jesus, Moses, Allah, Tom Cruise, whoever you pray to... would you EVER take a picture of someone doing their business (Let alone put it on the internet)!?

Not only does this violate any and all moral codes, but IT'S FUCKIN DISGUSTING. The bathroom is a sacred place where you can go do your biz in peace and private. It's the one place you do NOT under any circumstance compromise on boundaries, safety or cleanliness. Hell, if I go into a bathroom with no lock, it's like you can hear the "Jaws" theme in the background.

Even worse, there are pictures of girls eating/drinking while on the can! Lord have mercy and may fecal particles fall into your beer. If the plague ever comes back, I guarantee it's transmitted through college girls who take pics of each other on the john. There should be a site called 2girls1can to publicly humiliate bitches who take pics of each other in the lav.. in fact, I might start it.. get your popcorn ready.

You know that rumor about the guy who had sex with a monkey that started AIDS? Imagine BEING the rumor who started some other awful disease because you were eating a McChicken and drinkin your beer all while being documented dropping a deuce! People don't forget!

So the next time you think it'd be cute to take a pic of your friend on the shitter, please keep a few things in mind...

1. You are a disgrace, no question.
2. You might become the next big disease rumor, in fact... I'm calling it now, this is how Swine Flu, Bird Flu and SARS all started.. spread the word.
3. You will lose any chance at finding a real job after employers find you on 2girls1can.
4. Your shameful acts more than likely WILL land you on someone's blog.
5. This could be you!

Shameful at best, yuck!

BBW is Usually a Lie.

Disclaimer- this is an emailed entry sent to us by Marissa from Ohio.

I...hate..."BBWs". Hate them with every fiber of my being.

My issue isn't the size...or the fact that they're confident (because in a world where everyone is trying desperately to change themselves someone with confidence is refreshing)...it's the tacky ones who post the worst pictures anyone will ever see that make me want to go get my concealed carry license.
In no way am I implying that you have to be thin to be beautiful. That is a crock of shit and is easily dis-proven.
But here's my question: What makes someone think that this is even remotely attractive? No really I'll wait for an answer.

Perhaps these women are confused...because often they describe themselves as "curvy". Curvy implies that you have a decent sized chest, small-ish waist, and noticeable hips. Like an hourglass or a guitar. Curvy should not be confused for fat (which needs no definition). And I know that there are men out there who are chubby chasers and that's great because I do believe that there is someone for everyone. But telling these women that they're the finest thing on Earth and convincing them to pose half naked and look back at you so you can post it to the internet is just wrong.

I have the fear that all this "BBW" bullshit is going to lead to a REALLY unhealthy and fat generation sometime here soon. Acceptance and tolerance are great...but sugar-coating isn't. It's okay to be whoever you are but some women are taking this too far. They're letting this go from healthy self-love to an excuse to eat what they want and not do a single exercise a full calender year. They may start gaining a little and just call it "extra meat". Then they keep going and talk about how it's not a big deal. Then before you know it a chick who is 5'3" is pushing the two and a quarter mark and then decides that she's a "BBW" who looks like Janet Jackson. Not only is it degrading to you to have to lie about your appearance...but it's degrading to the person you lied to and tricked into taking you for coffee. Stop it. Please.

There is a such thing as big and beautiful. Especially when you keep your gahdamn clothes on. So here's my advice to my fellow girls who like cake and hate exercise: stop the damn posing half naked! And stop putting the shit on the internet for people to find and make fun of. You CAN be big and beautiful. Seriously. But be a classy lady like me.

...I am not a blogger...

Download of the day: "Break You Off" by The Roots. Old song...but for unknown reasons- especially unknown since no one is breaking this off...but I digress- I've been stuck on it for the last two weeks.

Fried Chicken & Watermelon

Fried Chicken & Watermelon
4.27.09

I never understood how these foods were supposed to be iconic and endemic to only Black people. Last I checked, both per capita (per person) and on the whole, White people consume more chicken (fried or otherwise) than anyone else. Same with watermelon. I know, I know, the minstrel shows and the Blackface mocking that took place years ago used both these foods as symbols of the "underclass"/animalistic nature that Blacks supposedly had, but sheesh.

The Obama stuff was laughable in that people are still resorting to those same tactics in order to make Black people feel inferior. Seriously, is that the best you've got? Shiver me timbers. Where are we at in society today that such tasty foods have made so many Black people feel like they're playing into some silly stereotype just by consuming them.

I suppose showing images of little kids eating porridge doesn't have the same effect, huh, does it?

Shame on you who still use these foods to denigrate Blacks.

The Staten Island Orange Girls (And Guys)

The Staten Island Orange Girls (And Guys)
4.27.09

As you all know, I have lived on Staten Island at a couple of junctures in my life. The whole island is a paradox. There's the unspoken element that controls everything that goes on throughout Staten Island -- and that no one needs to mention by name (and I won't here) and then there is what you see erstwhile. If you only went off what you saw visually on Staten Island, you would disagree. And I can see why.

I would estimate that 65% of Staten Island is Italian. A good 10% are Black, another 10% are Jewish and the rest is everyone else, Latino citizens, illegal migrant workers (taking what few jobs exist on SI, BTW) and people from everywhere else.

Amongst the younger set, there has been a disturbing trend the past ten years or so with this fascination with trying to look eternally tan. It's not just the girls, either. The guys are just as bad -- with their excessively-gelled spiked hair, douche shirts and in-your-face attitude. Personally, they don't bother me. Heck, a few of them were friends of mine when I was going to school in Brooklyn back in the day. No harm on my end. But I can see why they have such a reputation with the ladies.

The girls, however, are hilarious. Again, they don't bother me -- because again, some of them are friends of mine ha. But everything from the extreme accent "Staaaaten Oyyyyyland" (Staten Island) and the constant bitching and moaning about their terrible love lives (the running joke about SI chicks are that they all purposefully go after douches and then whine when they inevitably hurt them; since that potpulation of douches basically encompasses most of the guys on SI, this is a recurring theme, hence the joke) to the FAKE ORANGE TANS.

I swear nothing is funnier than seeing a girl who was a shade or two darker than PALE one day and the next she looks like the Tang Orange Juice mascot. Especially the ones who overdo it in the tanning bed and their skin gets tight and painful. Not to mention the ones who SPRAY on the tan. Sheesh. It's so embarrassingly fake (and unattractive) but yet they still do it.

And I'm still friends with some of them, so no harm to me. Ha.

The Flyin' Dorito Bitch.

See here's the thing. We all have our own preferences when it comes to chicks (or dudes) looks-wise. With that said, just because they "aren't your type" or you don't know them doesn't give you any right to just try and make em look bad. Some people try to play some slick shit which initially seems innocous but at the end of the day- is truly fucked up.

Saturday night, myself and a few of my boys were chillin on a rooftop just enjoyin the night shootin the shit and fraternizing with some new people (though you know me, I'm not a fan of the we need more wood for di fiyah cockfests). This Asian chick comes out with a bowl which apparently has Chips Ahoy and some Doritos and she asks my white friend if he would like to take one- which obviously he does. Myself and my black friend wanted a couple also but I guess she didn't notice this right away. I'm convinced this was deliberate. My black friend asks her if he could take one...but instead of her coming around with the bowl- she tries to THROW it at him like a flower girl at a wedding. You mean to tell me you're too lazy to continue your initially nice gesture and just throw a fuckin chip at my boy like he's supposed to show his skills or some shit? First of all the throw was horrible- it actually landed inbetween our lounge chairs...so I'm not sure what kinda message that's supposed to send? It ain't a jump ball for a fuckin chip. Needless to say, my black friend was none too pleased with this and nor shouldn't he be.

He gets up and walks towards their direction where they have the chips and he asks again for a chip. She apologizes now and goes "Oh I'm sorry that I threw the chip like that." Get the fuck outta here- don't try to save face when confronted, that's just a bitch move. She hands him a chip. Dissatisfied with this however, he asks if he could have some more and before she could answer he puts his hand and takes about 5 or 7 more. Rather than eating them though, he walks away with them and then just throws em on the floor ha. Poetic justice if you ask me. They didn't say anything (nor they really could).

This Asian outta be ashamed of herself and her actions; and for her peoples is quite honestly a Disgrace To Her Race.

And so on.

F Your Own Life

I don't know who invented this whole "Fuck my life!" phenomenon, but I sure wish I did (so I could beat them unmercifully). I got the whole premise behind it, running with a saying for when things turn sour quickly (usually in odd and ironic ways). Running a website for it that lets people anonymously contribute is amazingly idiotic. After the site was recommended to me, I read through a few and had nothing to say other than "bull shit." These are so fake, I stopped reading after the third or fourth one. Not only are they dumb, but completely unimaginative as well. A few examples:

"I woke up for school and was really tired! I fought through it and took a long shower, cleaned my room, got dressed, ate breakfast and all. Once I was ready to go I looked at my clock and it said 3:22 a.m! FML!"

C'mon now. For starters, how did you just randomly wake up and decide it was time to go? No alarm? I know I ALWAYS check my clock to see if I can squeeze out a few extra minutes. I know some people get up at 5:30 or 6 for school and all, but by the time you're ready to leave it's at least showing signs of light outside. How many people are really that unconscious about budgeting their time? Fake as all fuck.

"Today I was at the gym and my friend was at the water fountain. I walked by and gave him a man slap on the ass. Turns out it wasn't my friend, now I have a black eye! FML!"

Riiiight. So you casually ass slap your friends in public? Even assuming you did make this ridiculous mistake, someone would REALLY punch you over it? Jeez, how long did you think about this one, 5 seconds? I'd love to get kicked out of my gym over a mistaken ass slap so they can keep my money, revoke my membership and call the cops. Oh wait, that never happened, you're a lying sack of shit.

By now you've got my point, but it gets worse. Now the plague has spread to everything. Facebook, Twitter, you name it. Everyone puts up their status (as if more than 3% of your "friends" care) with their FML! on the end. As if their lives are really at all fucked up. It'll be like, "Pulling an all nighter for a test, FML!" or "Doing homework on a Friday night, FML!" To be honest, not only is your life not fucked, but I don't give a flying fuck. Please stop being an attention whore and looking for sympathy from others. You are a sad individual, dig a hole and bury yourself.

The Many Faces Of Men

The Many Faces Of Men
4.22.09

Actually, I only want to discuss two faces. Primarily because most living, breathing, heterosexual males (read: not these types who don't care to play NOR watch ANY sports). If you are offended by my saying that. GOOD.

Face #1

The "DAMN! LOOK AT THAT ASS!!!" Face.

The guys reading this are already nodding slowly in agreement. They know it well. It is a mixture of angst, pleasure, disgust, anger and other strong emotions. Basically, it is the same face one makes when they smell a particularly rancid fart, baby diapers or imbibe some bitter beer. It is a twisted mangled mess. Take a look: http://s560.photobucket.com/albums/ss48/esquire212/?action=view&current=2.jpg.

Face #2

The "YOOOO DID YOU SEE THAT NASTY DUNK?!" Face.

Frequently seen while watching highlights of Josh Smith, Dwight Howard, Rudy Gay or Shawn Kemp (in his Seattle days). The same face. The same contortions. The one difference: it seems that it is exclusive and endemic to the Black Male Species. It goes like this: http://s560.photobucket.com/albums/ss48/esquire212/?action=view&current=2-1.jpg.

The thing about these faces is that women know what they are in reaction to (given the respective scenarios). Dead giveaways.

Admit it. You either smiled or nodded or both at this post.

Public Decorum

Public Decorum
A True Disgrace To My Race

These are just random observations I've made from recent social excursions.

I am at the doctor's office about to get steroid shots like Mark McGwire, but then this guy (on a phone that looks like it came out in 2001, and seems like he thinks he has a brand new iPhone 4G or the latest Crackberry or HTC) gets on his phone and proceeds to talk LOUDLY in the doctor's office. Mind you, signs are posted everywhere to not use your cell phone in the lobby. Much less loudly. My mom and I sit there in utter embarrassment. I may have turned red, actually, but it's not like you would've noticed ha.

Never piss off a mother from the Caribbean. She will remind you of every social injustice that she and Black people in general http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGMlbTOnUpU.

One thing that draws my ire more than anything is to see a Black kid who comes from a home with two hard-working parents who gave them ample attention, provided for them plentifully and enabled them to go to the finest schools and afterschool programs go OUT OF THEIR WAY to act ignorantly, dress like they are from the slums (and front like they are from the 'hood). Yeah, go ahead and continue to perpetrate ALL the stereotypes while you're at it, bombaclaat.

There's nothing worse than eating at a fast food establishment nowadays. One of two things (or maybe both) are going to occur without fail. You are going to have a nasty attitude-ridden female ready to pop off if you order something that requires her to press the keypad too often and risk breaking her nails. The other thing, which for the LIFE of me I do not understand lately, is one in two guys at the fast food joint is gay. I don't mean down low, I mean LIBERACE.. Sylvester... Perez Hilton gay. And they are so bold as to try and hit on patrons. I darn near lost my desire to eat my warmed over Single Cheese combo after leaving Wendy's one day. What on earth...?

One last thing. This ain't the 70s. It's time out for these wannabe pimp guys -- usually in their 40s or early 50s with these BRUCE BRUCE-Electric colored suits strutting around at a club that is full of young women in their early 20s. Isn't there something wrong with that picture? Maybe they are part of the reason why women are choosing to date gay men http://www.theroot.com/blogs/hardline/are-black-women-choosing-gay-men or going to gay weddings or gay clubs. All to avoid guys like this?

WHERE ARE WE AT IN SOCIETY TODAY?!?!

The Politically Correct/Incorrect Parent.

Yes, I have decided to make a guest appearance on this bitch. You can check me out also on the R-Block Blotter.

Livin in NYC you run into many a mom who is either young as hell (yes, under 21) or they're straight outta the Caribbean school of thought (like mine was). Either way, the way they act towards their kids sometimes is straight wild. The thing is though, personally I ain't got a problem with it half the time- sometimes that kid needs to get his ass whooped, even in public. Your little boy or girl gets outta line, he/she need to know their role and shut their mouth and learn some respect. These kids nowadays don't get whipped so that's why they act the way they do...and we're all goin to the shitter because of it. Wahhh, don't hit your kid that's abusive...SHUT UP! Unless you're gonna hit your son with the Stone Cold Stunner or punch him/her in the face, who said there was anything wrong with the belt? Shit, I turned out just fine. I'm an advocate for whippin my child's ass at home but I'm sure my future wife (gotta be optimistic here) will say "No you can't do that you don't want to hurt him." Go call SuperNanny.

But then there are those times in which you're just makin a complete ass of yourself...or the kid makes an ass out of you and you just take it like you did (and that's why he/she's on this Earth). Kids are gonna whine and complain and don't know when to shut up (which is expected) but you got the firecrotch, sorry, hot-headed ones who let it get to them real quick and begin a humiliating (try this at home instead of on Jamaica Ave.) smackdown of this kid's rear end or arms, all in all yelling shit which they can't hear anyway because they're too busy crying. Back then it would probably be looked at and people just go "Yep, as you should" but now with the pussification of America they'll probably just shake their head or try to say something to the mother. As I said before I'm in the middle with this. You gotta be stern for sure but unless you need some self-respect also.

Then you got the kid who takes an inch and takes it all the way to the bank. He/She'll have fits for the ages but you do nothin about it because you don't wanna be perceived as this malicious, bad parent (this is true especially in areas where there are less minorities, since everyone wants to be viewed as a Great American Family where nothing goes wrong). You let him say shit such as "I'ma doo-doo on you" or "You freaking suck mommy, to hell with you" and all they do is do some gasp and say "How could you Timmy??" That shit don't fly in the hood. Or maybe it does, because the mothers cuss at the kids too- I mean what else are u gonna expect? Of course they're gonna do it back.

Depending on your school of thought this is DISGRACEFUL...or it may be tasteful.

And so on.

Fishin' in the Wrong Pond

In recent conversation with various women, they all talk about liking/wanting to go to particularly gay places. This is the literal use of the word gay, not the negative connotation. 

A young lady I know was saying how she and her friends enjoy going to gay bars. I asked why and what benefit could possibly come from this. She replied, "Girls like hanging out with guys who won't try shit." Now I don't know where in the man by-laws it states that you must try to fuck anything that walks, but I must have missed that section. To this, I say step your guy game up.  Stop hangin out with grimy/desperate guys with no standards. I'd say a good 80% of women I talk to I have no interest in ever touching, and I'm not some dude who never gets out or anything. I find it funny that the same girls will find it weird that lesbians will hit on them in such bars. You are there, you are a woman... it's a safe assumption you are probably gay. If you go into a gay bar or club and get hit on by someone of the same sex, that is on YOU.

Another lady told me that she'd like to attend a gay wedding (now that gay marriage is being legalized in some states). I can appreciate wanting to go to one of the first gay weddings for historical purposes, but what's the difference? You may now kiss... the groom? Woo hoo. I also find it particularly funny that people who told me they want to go to a gay wedding despise the thought of marriage themselves. That's just ludicrous to me.

These are not even the point of this edition of D2YR. The real point is, that each of these people (as well as others like them) have pulled the "It's so hard to find a man" card in my presence before. 

Now, not only is going to gay places counterintuitive to finding a man interested in you... it's completely opposed. If you're complaining about finding guys and then you don't want to hang around guys that "try shit," I have no words for you. If you complain about the quality of guys who approach you, then re-evaluate your image or try approaching a guy for once in your life. You don't have to put a smooth move on, but if you just start a conversation they will more than likely find confidence in that and show you interest in return.

Despite the fact that this applies to a gender and not a race, I'll allow it. If you only chill with gay dudes and avoid straight guys, and then complain you can't find a mate.. you are a walking damn SHAME. If I only chilled with lesbians and then complained I can't find a girl that meets my preferences, you'd say I was an imbecile too! Basically, put on something that isn't frumpy/yet says I'm not a slut... go out, and if you're not attracting the guys you want, then take some god damn initiative and start a conversation. If you are passive and wind up going home alone, that's on YOU. Guys have to accept this on a constant basis, it's time for y'all to learn! In life, sports, work, and everything else.. being aggressive for what you want is everything. Sit around and wait, and it ain't comin. So re-read this, take notes and shut yer god damn mouth about inability to find a good man. Disgraceful.

Disgraceful: New Ballpark Edition

This week I had the pleasure of visiting both new NY ballparks and in the midst of the wonder, I was inspired! So this edition of D2YR will revolve around the many despicable human beings you may run into at a major sporting event.

Censorship Police:

So at one point during one of the games, the home team had runners on and the score was relatively close. After being a few shots deep and gulping down an opening week beer, I say "Let's score some runs somehow, I don't give a fuck!" At which point a dude turns around at me, "Excuse me! I have my 9 year old daughter here!" Lord have mercy on your soul. You took the risk of bringing your 9 year old girl into Queens... at a major sporting event with New York fans... and it's late at night. Do you really think you're not going to hear/see any kind of profanity at all? Are you really trying to shelter her that badly? It's one thing to say to her "We shouldn't talk like that" or something along those lines, it's another to be all "Hey, everyone hold back your inner fan-hood because I elected to give one of my 100-200$ seats to a little girl who probably doesn't even give a flying fuck she's there. Why don't you take her to the Bronx and sit between the guy in the Buck Foston shirt and the angry foreign guy who only knows the words "Let's Go Jankees!" and "Fuck!" Please rot and die. 

Speaking of which, I'll also have you know that they make people with "offensive" shirts turn them inside out. What is this world coming to?

The Unnecessary Sore Thumb:  

If you live in an area with more than one local team, you know this person. I attended opening week at both the new Yankee Stadium and Citi Field only to be appalled at the number of people in the alternate team's gear. It's one thing to be a fan of the away team and support them. It's a whole different blasphemy to represent the other local team who isn't playing. I saw douchebags at Citi with Yankee gear, I saw assclowns at Yankee in Mets gear... please proceed to the promenade level and jump. Do you need attention this badly? Are you REALLY that proud of the team you root for that you have to let people know when they aren't involved? And really, I bet you were at home giggling like "He he he, I'm gonna stick it to all those fans and wear MY team's gear just because I am SO bad ass!" Chug some arsenic you fuckin slouch.

Where's Waldo?:  

I call this person where's waldo because they are so god damn out of place, they might as well be dressed like that child molesting candy cane with glasses. You have more than likely seen this person... you go to a game and you're baffled. Why is there a person in a Twins jersey at a Yankee/Indian game? The fuck if I know. For fuck's sake, did you roll out of bed and go "Shit, I don't have a jersey of either team... well, I'll be a baseball fan today!" Just bring your toaster in the bath with you... or did you think, "I need to show how proud I am of my completely out of market team!" I have no words for you, please die.

The 2 Pump Jump: 

No, there is no ejaculation involved... but almost. Basically, if you've ever been to a baseball game you have seen this person. Every fly ball that makes it out of the infield they jump up and scream like it's a homer. Yet if you ever judged a fly ball in your life, you would know the difference between a deep drive and a lazy fly. Do yourself a favor and go watch little league, at least you'll do wonders for the morale of the kids when you cream over their pop-ups.

The Faker: 

You have seen this person once or twice. Everyone knows certain teams DO NOT put names on their jerseys. Meanwhile, tons of douchebags come to the ballpark in their terrible fake jersey with a name on it. This is almost as bad as people who buy the cheap knock off NFL jerseys with the holes in the numbers. For fuck's sake people, the sewn on letters are only a little more.  I know it's a recession, but at least have some self respect!

All in all, if you can't show self respect at a ball game... JUST KEEP YOUR ASS AT HOME!

Can't Wear Skinny Jeans Cause My Knots Don't Fit..

This next post is for you, emo kid. You know, guys walkin around with a pair of jeans made for girls, a bright pair of dunks, a zip up hoodie and some band t-shirt.

For starters, who started the craze of buying girls jeans for dudes? Some guy just walked into his sister's room one day and said "mmm... these are cute, lemme try em on." Then he enjoyed the way his junk was packed in like sardines, so he told all of his friends? Cross-dressing has never been cool (sorry Dennis Rodman), people who do it either have identity issues or crave attention (or are legit insane). I wonder if most of these kids go out and buy their own girl jeans, or if they find a female in trust (sister, emo gf, mom, etc.) to go in and buy them or at least be a decoy. Now, there's even a skinny jean fad with rappers. Though, their 'skinny' jeans really aren't that skinny, pretty normal but for guys who have been wearing baggy clothes and saggin' hard all their lives.. I can imagine feeling confined. Regardless, there's a limit to how loose or how tight pants should be (for dudes). You shouldn't be able to smuggle anyone across a border in your pants and you shouldn't be able to detect the exact location of the man's goods. 

As for your bright pair of dunks... if you don't skate and can't even bother to match them with something you're wearing, just kill yourself. Especially if you just tried to pick the most absurd color combination that ever existed to draw even more attention to your already petty self. Ugh.

Your zip up hoodie and band tee are a staple to the emo wardrobe. You need a hood so you can drape it over your head in shame when people laugh at you in the street. The zip up feature also helps when people ask who the hell the band is on your shirt (because EVERYONE knows it's not a group anyone's heard of, that'd be too "mainstream"), or when they tell you that band sucks. Remember, if you wear a shirt that someone recognizes, has a brand logo, etc... you MUST be a poser like the rest of the "sheep" you tell everyone they are (bla bla bla corporate america... Shut the fuck up, take your speech elsewhere).

Needless to say, take your questionable haircut and possible eyeliner usage along with your emo wardrobe and wander onto a freeway somewhere. No question, you ARE a disgrace. Now go put on music about blood and such, cut yourself a little and have a good cry (as if you need a reason).

I Love the 80's

For the record.. No, I don't love the fuckin 80's. This show is a direct testament to what is wrong with the greater white demographic who still are young enough to party. Why in the hell is it when you go to any spot in the USA where young people might gather, you are destined to hear lame, played out 80's music? This music wasn't even this popular when it was first made, who in god's name decided it should be brought back? The sadder fact is, the vast majority enjoy it, embrace it and have no shame pumpin' their fist to it in 80's glory.

You know exactly the bullshit I'm talkin' about; "Don't stop belieeeevin'!" or "Liiivin on a praaayer!" What exactly are these songs even about!? Listen to the lyrics and then ask yourself.. who put these on paper and said, "Yeah, this is gonna be a classic!" 99% of people can't even name another Journey song. 

This "Bring back the 80's!" following is sickening at times. What was so good about the 80's that you would want to relive it? Half of young people were too young to even remember the 80's.. so why do they act like they were there in the crowd waving their zippo to shit like Def Leppard. Think about that a sec, someone INTENTIONALLY named a band Deaf Leopard, and then decided (on top of that) we're also going spell it wrong to be cool! None the less, young people everywhere put that fist up and scream "Pour some sugar on meee!" Disgraceful. Rejoicing to songs written by dudes with long hair, headbands and torn leather pants. For the love of god, please just let the 80's die once and for all (along with mullets, pet rocks, denim jackets and chia pets). 

If you find yourself partaking in such acts at any place or time, you may just be a disgrace to your race. God bless and good night.